Why Do You Worry (So Much)?

How to not worry so much, let’s start first with one question.

What’s the best part of being a worrywart?

Is absolutely nothing!  Right? If your friends or family call you a worrywart, then it is time to:

  1. Understand what is behind all the worry 
  2. Learn some new habits to replace worrying with something more positive and purposeful.

Worrying is like praying for what you do not want.  

Why do you worry? She is meditating on feeling positive and purposeful.  Focus on what you can do not what you can't control.

Why on this green earth would you want to do that, pray for what you don’t want?  Does focusing on the opposite of the outcome you do want make sense?  Of course not.   

I asked a few worrywart-friends that question.  They all said about the same thing.  It makes them feel more prepared when the worst does happen.  

Good grief.  

Understanding the Law of Attraction is a game-changer.


The law of attraction states that what you focus on you will attract. Focus on being healthy. Worrying will only cause harm.

The Law of Attraction teaches you that your thoughts become things.  What you focus on, you attract more of.  

If you spend most of your time focused on want you do not want, guess what you get more of?  More of what you don’t want.

Oprah does an amazing job of explaining the principles of this law here.

In some situations, it feels near impossible to not worry.

I admit that there have been times when I have imagined something horribly unimaginable.  It is downright cruel the thoughts I’ve allowed to circulate in my mind. 

Almost always, my worry thoughts center around one of my children when they are on a road trip.   When I catch myself doing this, I find something to redirect my thoughts quickly.  If you have children in your life, you can probably relate.

Worrying is a habit; a particular lens for seeing the world.

Her worry is a lens of how she sees her world.  Have you ever tracked a habit to see where it came from? You can improve.

Some people seem conditioned to worry about everything.  

For example, not finding a parking spot, or someone not liking them; who they’ve just met, or losing something important to them.  Your proclivity to being a worrywart may have begun as a child.

Have you ever tracked a particular behavior to understand where it came from?

With a support system you can lean on, it can be a useful and illuminating exploration.  Non-judgmental curiosity is a good place to start.

Why not be a “Susie-Sunshine”? 

How many times have you heard, “Expect the best, plan for the worst”. 

Instead, why not shift to expect the best, period? In this way, you do not give any power to “the worst”. It is still smart and, in many cases, required by law, to have insurance in case of an accident. Moreover, it is a good idea to have a plan for the unexpected. It is simply not necessary to dwell on it.  

Your mind is good at tricking you under the guise of staying safe.  

When you focus on the bad “what ifs” you justify being a worrywart to yourself.  Worrying is a good avoidance tactic for sure.  

To feel safe, worrying limits opportunities for growth and adventure.  Gain clarity by exploring what you are most worried about. 

Do you worry about whether you are enough?

You can learn new habits to be happy like her.  Why do you worry so much? Most people fear not measuring up to expectations.

 

Can you relate to this?

Here’s an example.  A few months back, I woke up in the morning with a knot in my gut.  I had a big talk to give that evening, and I was worried about how well I would do if I would connect with my audience.  Getting dressed, I worried if my outfit was just right. 

When driving to the event, continuing to worry, would there be too much traffic that would make me late? Would I find a place to park? 

All of these worries boiled down to one thing:  Am I enough?

I was a wreck when I arrived.  Realizing my level of tension, I decided to hang out in the parking lot and meditate.  Once I quieted my mind, the realization of how I had been torturing myself all day with worry was very clear. 

Just like with any habit, with a new discipline, change is possible.  

Alone in the parking lot, I visualized myself feeling empowered in front of a crowd.  Practice visualizations of performing.

What I mean by this, by saying a mantra and *I AM’ statements is a discipline that can shift my energy the quickest.  In a matter of minutes, I was in a completely different mindset. 

With new insight, I stayed in my parked car and moved into a headspace of having faith. Claiming I would do great and be well-received.  I visualized myself on stage feeling empowered and inspiring, seeing the listeners nodding their heads, completely engaged with me and my message.  

Here’s the good news.  My body language had completely changed when I walked through the parking lot, now feeling confident and excited.  The worrying had disappeared.

In order to let go of worry, you have to lean into faith.  

The two beliefs, faith and worry, cannot co-exist at the same moment.  As quickly as your thoughts can turn to worry, they can just as quickly be redirected to faith.

It takes practice and discipline.

Most often what we worry about is something that we have no control over in the first place.  With a new awareness, you can train yourself with every worrisome thought, to build a new habit of seeing the best in the situation.  I love the line in Lee Ann Womack’s song, “Give faith a fighting chance.” 

She is leaning into her faith so that you see the best in every situation.   Faith takes wisdom, practice, and discipline.

3 steps to let go of the worry 

  1. Acknowledge your feelings. 
  2. Gain clarity. What is the truth underneath the worry?
  3. Meditate to quiet your mind.  Visualize the best possible situation. 

Practice saying mantras.

 

You are enough. Say and feel the words "I invite unlimited joy, abundance, and health into my life." Why do you worry so much?

One of my favorite mantras:  I love and appreciate the ease in my life that I am attracting.  I invite unlimited joy, abundance, and radiant health into my life.  Living with limitless love and light, I ask, believe, and receive.  Today is going to be an amazing day!

*I AM statements are affirmations to your inner being.  

Some favorites of mine are:

I AM enough, I AM loved, I AM vibrant.

Because I love this exercise so much, I could go on and on.

Here’s my suggestion.  Create your own I AM statements and say them out loud, feeling the words deeply!

Want to explore how you can have more support to create the outcomes you most want in your life? Book a Discovery Call with me!  Click here.

 

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